Two Dashes

I attended two memorials within a few days of each other--both the honored--young, in their sixties. One took place in a beautiful church on a hill in which the deceased served and worshipped. The other,  in a small room, the 2nd floor of the mortuary, a few folded chairs barely filled.

 For one, his ashes rested in a beautiful crafted wooden box, I am sure he made himself, since he did that. The attendees sang more than appropriate hymns together, "Be Thou My Vision," and "Amazing Grace." The other, a viewing, his shrouded body flanked by a collage of pictures and a spray of beautiful red roses.

One was a Sheriff's Deputy, the other a Chiropractor by profession, both involved and committed to serving their community and people without compromise.

One received a diagnosis of cancer in April and lost the battle in a few short months.
One suffered for several years with failing health.

Honored by many of his friends, pastors, colleagues and family, Ron, my cousin, received a passionate display of memorial speeches and a tribute to his heroism. We felt in awe of what he accomplished and gave. A "casket guard" represented by the Sheriff Dept., --in this case, an urn guard, each fully uniformed officer stood their allotted time next to the table where his ashes rested, in ceremonial respect and honor.

A service prepared by a minister he never knew, Walter, my friend from high school probably smiled from heaven as the minister shared from the Book of Genesis, his heart wanting to give us hope. Walter never wanted attention, always caring more about what you were up to. Leaving that room, we proceeded up a long hill, a procession following the hearse to where the burial ceremony continued, over-looking the valley he grew up and served his patients in. Arriving there, several more friends from high school enlarged the crowd. Below his dug grave, the burial section of children. Their headstones recently decorated for the fall season, aglow with marigolds pumpkins, mums...it gave that tangible melancholy--a feeling of hope lost. A choir of angelic voices, I'd like to think, welcomed my friend to his heavenly Home. In that we remember that God is the Giver of Eternal Hope.

Walter, bottom left with dear friends from High School, our annual reunion picnic. 

Yes, both memorials were different, yet in death, we are all at level ground. Eternity and our legacy lifts us up because of our love for God, demonstrated in service and kindness to others. Their memory etches a hope eulogy in our own interactions, for us to remember who they were to us forever in the tombstones of our hearts. It should inspire us to do something with that dash in our life's journey, the dash that holds a lifetime of who we are in Christ and to this broken world.

May 3, 1954 ~ ....   That dash represents my legacy. What will it be, what will yours be?

My cousin, Ron, my friend, Walter...their dashes, their selfless lives touched me and many others. I want to share two stories as I remember them, being told at each service.

Ron, trekked to Mt Everest in the Himalayan mountains of Tibet. An extraordinary athlete, this accomplishment is no ordinary endeavor. As you may have seen in documentaries or news stories, when climbing Mt. Everest, one is accompanied by local mountain guide called a Sherpa. Ron, being a friendly, very talkative man, struck up a conversation with one Sherpa on the journey. A topic came up about goals and dreams, an obvious, easy topic since Ron at that moment made a big check on that bucket list. The Sherpa ( with the help of translators), expressed to Ron that his goal in life was to be an "ancestor." In his culture, to achieve that, he needed to own property, a parcel of land. I don't know the details of how Ron made that happen, but he gifted his Sherpa after the climb with the amount he needed in his country, to make that purchase and achieve his dream, to become an "ancestor."

Ron and THE mountain! 

At the graveside service of my friend, Walter, as mentioned earlier, many more appeared on the hill,  fellow classmates of mine and Walter's from high school long ago. While the pastor said a few more words, there remained some missing statements about the man, Walter. These friends from high school,  were quick to give Walter the praise and honor he deserved, share their anecdotes and love. One story I wish to share here.

Just out of high school and entering junior college in the fall, Debbie and her friend needed jobs.  Seeing an opportunity to work in a factory, the excitement and impulsive urge created by the need for sustenance, made them eager to get hired. Hearing of this, Walter was not too certain this sounded like a good thing. Not in the best part of town, Walter insisted that he pick up both girls and drive them to the factory to do the paperwork. He then arranged to take them as well, their first day, which he did. Did I mention they were working graveyard shift?  Not only did he take them, he waited in the parking lot all night for them to finish their shift and make sure they got home safe. After a few days, the girls realized Walter's wisdom and quit. Who does that?--waits all night long, sacrificing their own time to make sure their friends remain safe? Walter did. As I got to know him more in our adult years, he shared one of his greatest joys, attending church at the Salvation Army, here in Ontario. A humble place and somewhere he knew he could serve God quietly and kindly, he did that and I saw that joy, that Holy Spirit within him when he talked about that experience. Walt also poured his life into his girlfriend's son, helping him to achieve his goals of entering the Armed Services. That became very evident when meeting Brandon at Walter's service. Walter loved deeply and unselfishly, a legacy filtered now into this young man for his own future.

No one knows the time, the place, the when or the where, the how...What I do know is the who.
Who will be impacted by my legacy? What kind of legacy am I leaving, presenting? Does it reflect the God I serve? Am I making a difference for the Kingdom? Am I bold enough to climb a "Mt. Everest" of negativity, culture changes and untruths? Can I persevere when the world and craziness permeates every facet of life? Can I continue to write and give testimony of the legacy of Grace? Only in His strength, I can.

Both my cousin and my friend pursued righteousness, right living. Both believed with all their hearts in the One True God and His purposes, to love God and love one another. Every day we make a choice--to live defeated or to live empowered. Trials come, but God promises that He walks with us through them and in that our faith strengthens, our legacy grows. In this Thanksgiving season, let's start with gratitude. Thank you God for the gift of Ron and Walter in my life. A grateful heart heals a broken heart etched with too many disappointments and sorrow. Heaven gains saints every moment. How can we invest in lives resulting in an eternal difference, a legacy rewarded in His perfect timing and providence?  Be Still and Know.

Well done good and faithful servants, well done.

Considerably yours, Coleene

Face to Face...Again...A Tribute to Special Friends.

What a month it has been!  Like a roller coaster ride of emotions,  I have been saddened by the loss of friends and exhilarated by the reuniting of old friends, accepted and rejected, dismissed and included, recognized and ignored, discovered the lost and forgotten and hugged and squeezed the brand new!  Well, isn't that just a picture of life itself?   Sharing today, a definite climb up, a reunion of many school friends. 

All Class Reunion

Last Saturday, our 7th annual all class reunion was held in the local park in the city where we grew up.  The weather the week before was delightful, beachy and pleasant.  The weather this week...the same. So why did our reunion have to be over 100 degrees in the shade?  Whew...it was hot! 

The night before, Ted and I enjoyed a quick get away time while waiting for my one of my best friend's plane to come in from Boston.  We left a little early from the stifling inland and headed towards the Coast, Long Beach to be specific. I was expecting a great crowd of people and to our surprise, we parked in Sea Port Village, walked over to a nice, quaint little grill and got a table overlooking the harbor while sharing a meal.  Ted was already making plans to come down again as soon as possible.  We (Ted and I) get so caught up sometimes in the day to day routines. I really think this is good therapy for us to be more spontaneous despite our lack of funds.   Sometimes a "break" is only a few miles down to the beach or up a hill over-looking a valley.  That is one reason I love California, we have a lot to offer very close by and it can be refreshing.

Our view from our table. 

Well, back to the Class Reunion.  It was a  marvelous turnout despite the heat; the air  filled with "oldies and rock and roll."  (I am talking about music here).  Name tags and crazy stories, tons of laughter and inspiration, group photos and  surprises captured the spirit of the day.   The most familiar quote?  "Wow, you haven't changed at all!"  After thinking on that one for awhile, speaking for myself, I have changed.  Physically for sure, but I am  more than anxious to share that my life continues to be transformed.  Some change is very hard, while other change I embrace. My friends these last few years of my life have meant more to me than at any other time and I forsee that this special gift God gives us in our later years, the transparency and the deepness of friendships serve to  enrich each other's lives.  This bond  will carry us through the next 10 to 20 years.

BFF'S

Left of me is Annie Kay, as she now wants to be called.  We didn't know each other that well in High School, but she has a great way of reconnecting and establishing a friendship on-line. We have shared many things.  Annie, you are still so beautiful and young!  Thank you for all your support these last few years, my newest BFF.   

  To  the right of me is Lynn.  I think I would need a whole new blog to post what she means to me.  We became tennis partners in PE at 14 years young our freshman year and our friendship has never taken a break since.  We stood up in each others weddings, and served together in YFC.  We held each other's newborns, and comforted each other at our parent's funerals. We  have gone crazy at concerts and had one too many beers at Dodger games. We have laughed until we have cried and cried together until we have laughed.    The Lord has been our Solid Rock throughout our individual walks.  I recently came across this picture of us taken in 1979...a few years after graduation.  Check out my perm!  Thank you my forever and Eternal BFF!

                                                 

Below me is Joyce.  If you look up positive attitude in the dictionary, you will see Joyce's picture. Joyce is full of wisdom and understanding, she is passionate and perserveres.  Her MS has not sidelined her personality or dignity and she continues to reach out to others.  Joyce has a great sence of humor which is one thing I love most about her. She is very down to earth.  We used to  "double date" a lot back in those days and I talked to her a lot about "boys."  (Will we ever understand them?)  Thanks my smart, big-hearted BFF!

Last but not least for sure is my BFF, Diane.  Diane and I share the love of art; creative souls bound by  a special understanding.  We both went to college at CSU Fullerton, majoring in fine arts.  Those were the days of gas lines so  we car-pooled to school.  A very  special friendship formed in those college years.  Diane is a gifted artist and a great communicator.  She gives fully of her gifts and her heart is in everything she does. She has bounds and bounds of energy and I wish we could all bottle it sometime and keep it in our pantry.  Diane as an artist, appreciates beauty and the beauty within us all.  She encourages me always and I adore her.  She has recently moved back to Boston, (after being there earlier in life as her husband finished his schooling at Harvard), but I feel our relationship is as close as it has ever been.  I cannot wait until Ted and I can go visit the East Coast.  I wouldn't want any other tour guide; no detail will be left out.  Thank you Diane, my BFF for all your words...every one of them,  for they make me smile!

One day, an even better reunion will take place in the Heavenly realms where God plans out our blessings.  I know for sure, the weather will be perfect, our spiritual bodies will be pain free and jumping for joy, the music will be glorious and  the conversations?...Well, I just might finally understand boys...

1 Corinthians 13:12 (New International Version)

12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

Brent, my neighbor as well as school mate, another special connection. Thank you again for always letting me tag along.   Rick, thank you for sharing and reflecting the Lord's Grace and forgiveness. Candace, your story is one all should hear and learn from,  for your ability way outshines your disability.  I love you all. 

Have you had any great reunions this summer?