Anointed & Appointed Friendship

My Reflective Thoughts on and for Linda Boutin

We found each other in a small group at a time we both were a bit lost. Linda was new to the church and found herself serving in the Dan Vasquez Memorial Library, her comfort zone, as well as the church office. In my grief after the loss of my son, Cathy Hoch and her persistent love, got us together and the three of us became fast friends. Soon, Linda heard from God what He wanted from her, to start a Christian Writer’s Group in the church. As I slowly began to trust and share my own heart in words from a tattered notebook, Linda asked me to partner with her.

With no clue what a writer’s group might look like, or how I might possibly be an asset, this decision changed my life, my walk with God and moved me forward in my own grief journey.

We formatted an outline. It started with Roman numeral I, OPENING PRAYER.

Linda prayed and she frequently used these words: “Lord, INFUSE Your Holy Spirit into our words so that we might give You the glory.”  Amen.

Linda’s friendship infused me, saturated me, filled me with a desire to fellowship with like-minded creatives in the most trusting environment where we could know God and make Him known through our written words.  She had a way of developing a confidence in me and would soon do the same for many women in this church, enabling them to tell their stories of God’s Goodness in the Coffee Break Ministry.

Roman numeral II, the JOURNAL QUESTION. We traded off weeks developing a thought provoking question for our group to ponder. The transparency, the insight, the humor and the tears bonded us as believers to continue what we took in from the sermon on Sunday and apply it to our lives.

Roman numeral number III on our outline: READING TONIGHT. Chapters from manuscripts, poetry, random thoughts and devotionals written in the off hours with hope or just the intent to encourage, filtered first through our group. Linda taught us to use our active voice, to show, not just tell us. She modeled that in her life, combatting and negotiating with a painful and personal disease most of her life, one not many could bare. She did it with bravery and tenacity which I believe kept her with us far longer than any might have thought.

One day, after her and Gary drove me home from an AWF meeting, she had a serious conversation with me. She wanted me to stop sharing my little stories. Growing very comfortable in that, she said it was time for me to move on. What she wanted from me? To write the book, my memoir of all God had done in the last 6 years or so. That is Roman numeral number IV, WRITING TIPS.  

WRITING PROMPT, Roman numeral number V. Last but not least, is Linda’s legacy. She leaves us with a prompt. Everyone has a story to tell of life, love and transformation. We share grief as well as gratitude and sometimes those overlap. We have messy families and challenges. We infuse (that word used on purpose) scriptures that speak only to us at the moment. We encounter people and have experiences, ups and downs, stagnant times and growth. BUT GOD, He prompts us, as Linda so graciously encouraged us to see, to tell of His glory.

As I close in prayer and thought, thank You LORD for my dear, sweet partner and friend, Linda. Our friendship… a gift from God for each other and I will forever be grateful to God for the inspiration to develop a unique ministry, AWF and work beside Linda in Coffee Break ministry. In God’s grace, Year 16 of AWF is going strong and I honor her as I sit in Room 2 every Wed. night with these friends she loved so much. Amen

 I’ll leave you with this quote from C.S. Lewis,

”What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it.”

Thank you for seeing the truth in me Linda, and encouraging me to write about it and lead others to do the same-- all for God’s glory.

 A  hot summer day doing a virtual radio interview for our upcoming writer's conference.

                   "Mary's Tears." -- a sketch I did for our first AWF devotional Advent book. 

Me, Linda and Cathy at a wedding photo booth 

Linda and one of her beloved basenji pups.

Cofffee Break Pajama Night 

AWF Year 15 

 

       One of many outlines for AWF curriculum. 

     Recruiting at church for our writing group, AWF. 

                                      A legacy continued. 

 

 

A Light of Surpassing Greatness

Not uncommon for me to see, hear, feel supernatural encouragement from the Holy Spirit, I believe with all my heart in the scripture that says, "If you seek Me, you will find Me when you search for Me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:13).  With eyes wide open, this summer I delve into the memory, the words, the sights and sounds of my story and God is along for every sentence. Writing a memoir of the grief and healing I've experienced in God's amazing grace, He continues to reveal His unrelenting Holy Spirit of comfort and affirm all He is guiding me to be as a minister in the faith. 

 About 15,000 words in, I've reached THE "chapter"--pathway where the trees breathe promise, where my mourning dawns anew, a chapter about butterfly angels on a mercy mission. 

~View to Heaven~

I am just finishing the chapter when the hard-working man comes home, ready to set himself up to view another world on a not so flat screen and sit for the evening in a worn, so worn and tired love seat. 

The blinds need adjusting; a filter to move the rays where they need to be, so we can see. He makes that move, ready to settle in. 

Are we blind to what needs to be seen? 

...And I am finishing up the chapter in the lowered light of the summer day, on the dining room table where the bread is served, where the cup is filled. 

I'm back there, back to those days of the unrelenting heaves of grief. I'm back to the worn tennis shoes, the overplayed music and the dark park with its illuminated spider webs and shadowy trees in the pre-sun, star fading mourning of mornings. 

The words finish up and I know this miracle once again, so wanting to capture the Truth of His Love, the end story that never ends. My heart is full and it feels glorious. 

The living room is quiet as the hard-working man showers off the day's labor and I stretch up to saunter into life in the evening with him. Looking up, I see into the living space, the light filtering in a perspective unseen before. 

I call out to the hard-working man, "come take a look at what is happening...hurry, before it changes."

The light is streaming in and hitting the wall across the room, the wall where a shelf holds the earthen vessel of ashes of our first born, the shelf that holds the sanctuary of his life. 

The light dances, filtered through the jasmine vines outside and the blinds. 

But I am not blind, for I see the trees, I see the butterflies, the sunflowers, the hummingbirds...

I see and know the Cross, where we can see the Light and Eternity coming together to make Perfect Sense. 

I've seen the dead, and I've seen lives arise from the dead and live with a new found purpose. 

I watch as the light shifts and paints on the canvas of my shelf-holding wall of love and I grab my cell phone. 

I capture the lit up heart, a heart-light. 

and wings of angels...


II Corinthians 3:6-7 the Apostle Paul tells us, "For God, who said, 'Light shall shine out of darkness,' is the One who has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the surpassing greatness of the power may be of God and not from ourselves."

I am moved to tears of gratitude, of worship in that very moment. 

The hard-working man comes down the stairs one painful step at a time and he sees my excitement over...light and shadows and walls,  ...and says, "cool!"

The light, still moving, turns the corner and pierces the space where my thoughts come to rest , where my head bows frequently. It spills onto the chair I sit and read His Word, basking in His inspiration and promises throughout my day, where hearts in friendship bonded for eternity. 

 The light brings Love, an affirmation, for the Holy Spirit whispers to me that God is the Light of this moment, and He is the light for all moments. 

What do we see in His light?  A revelation of His eternal love for us, as unworthy as we are, He came to be our Light and remove all of our darkness. 

Amen. 

I saw the Light, I accepted it into my own darkness and I know the Light is Good. 

II Corinthians 4:18 ...While we look not at things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal. 

The sun set, yet the Light in my soul, in my son's soul shines for eternity, of that I am sure without any shifting shadow of doubt. 

The hard-working man calls me the next day and wants to talk about the light,  --and the wall and the shelf, as he is thinking about it in his hard-working days upon days.  

God stirs up a heart to want more of Him and again I am warmed by a new sunrise. 

My memoir continues...and I am in awe of His goodness to me, overwhelmed by the Light. 

Psalm 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? 

John 8:12  Again therefore Jesus spoke to them, saying, "I am the light of the world; he who follows Me shall not walk in the darkness, but shall have the light of life." 

Amen. 

Replanting a Holy Seed

Strong?  Why of course, one of the strongest.  Crafted of the finest, well grained; my personality shines with a few good strokes of wax. I prefer the lemon.  Mitered and measured, fitted and fastened, I exude excellence.  My parts fit together in harmony; very useable.  My right side matches my left side, although I probably prefer more the right side.  My insides roll with the flow and hold all the treasures and tools for your imagination.  My limbs and core, flat out, wait to feel the elbows of thought, the tapping pen of pause, the erasure crumbs of regret, the prose of poetic praise or the guiding grace greetings.  I held The Book, many nights left open, pages studied, references supporting.  Marked and memorized. Preached and lived out.  Oiled in prayer.

If I touch you, rub my fingers along your grains that ribbon through, will I hear those words, will I remember?

Open me.   I am deep and wide, spacious and eager.  Look at my detailing.  You know I am committed to my Maker.  I am here to serve.  You too? 

If I pull my self up to embrace you, fold my hands in reverence before you, will you inspire me, encourage this wordsmith?

There is nothing I haven’t felt, all absorbed. Go ahead, craft a love letter, scribble a sketch, color a flower garden, sign on the dotted-line, write in the correct amount, scroll an announcement, think –out a thesis, doodle a design, chart out a chapter or two.  I am such a good listener.

Look me over.  Can you find a scratch? Yet time has healed. Tears seal.  Salt of the Earth.


Isaiah 6:13  And if there be yet a tenth in it, it also shall in turn be eaten up: as a terebinth, as an oak, whose stock remaineth, when they are felled; so the holy seed is the stock thereof. (KJV). 


I am a Holy Seed, an ornament of God-Man made hands. For Glory? He taught us his Glory; some continued to nurture the remnant of that glorious time, that heaven-bound seed. Things change and winds move.  Giving is God's heart. Your glory is my glory to reflect God's heart. 


I am listening. I open the drawers, roll up the top, sit before you and I can hear. Keep writing, it tells me.  Keep speaking of my love; and the words...The WORDS...


But Jesus answered, "I tell you, if these become silent, the stones will cry out!" Luke 19:40  NAS. 


Right now my words are few but gracious. Thank you.  Thank you for your sacrifice. Thank you for an inheritance, a gift of strength and beauty. I hope to honor its presence in my hearthome. 

Note: I received this beautiful roll top oak desk last week, a desk that once belonged to my brave and cherished late pastor, Dan Vasquez.  Soon, it will be moved upstairs and I hope to use it as a place for quiet time and study.  

FYI:  http://www.jewishencyclopedia.com/articles/11638-oak-and-terebinth

Writing: The Desire of My Heart.

 Sharing my feelings and thoughts, and what I think are creative anecdotes, puts me in that vulnerable spot of possible judgment.  It's downright scary!  ( I still feel anxious when I want to share).  Rhyming silly poetry all my life and excelling in essay writing in college; journaling finally became a constant in my life about eight years ago.  Notebooks were my companion after losing our house to a fire, not only for practical reasons to keep information, but I started writing out my prayers during this very trying time in our lives. Documenting my son's illness, both our good days and our not so good days, helped me to keep a good  reality check on myself.  A yellow highlighter marked the answered prayers and those notebooks became a personal but tangible way to see God at work in my life.  Somewhere in that fog of what I call my "cave dwelling years" , I started to share a little of my writing and I also purchased a sketch pad and some pastels off eBay. God gave me a memory of the artist I used to be.  Could I rediscover her? 

Later,  A friend told me about a writing site that she had heard about from another friend called Faithwriters.com.  I was new at this writing thing, well, the "writing for purpose" part anyways.  I just knew in my heart that I enjoyed it. I certainly knew I needed to keep busy and this was how I wanted to do this and  grow in my faith as well.  God filled my days and nights with thoughts, inspiration and memories as I allowed myself to spiritually feel His presence and seek my destiny...His purpose. Out of my personal grief, I heard heaven so loudly, I felt every touch of His Spirit, I saw everything as Spirit-driven, the Fragrance of God infused my thoughts and His sweet voice spoke to my soul. Unable to contain all God was doing, I had to write.  Poetry flowed,  devotions from my study of God's Word took on analogies, observances in life around me became an applicable storyline. Writing  brought me peace in a time when  I needed it most. 

When it came to the Faithwriters site, I was hooked right away, submitting stories almost every challenge.  I enjoyed the feedback and especially the challenge of coming up with a story or poem to fit the topic.  As my writing slowly improved, connecting  with a few other writers became an added bonus.  Although I was not real active on the message boards, the names of the writers and the ones like myself who wrote continually and amazingly, I might add,  became familiar.  In June of 2009,  Empty/Full appeared as a new weekly topic.  When I pondered that subject, I thought about a "glass...half empty or half full."

 Two characters, one with this optimistic view of life and one with this pessimistic view of life,  crawled across my keyboard (well, not literally),  thus "A Worm's Eye View" was born.  Yep, my characters were two worms.  As the story goes, these brothers, twins actually,  see things differently until one day, the more positive of the two, Peter,  decided his brother Thomas really needed a make-over, not just physically but mentally and spiritually as well. The attitude just had to go! 

I was rewarded with a First place in my category from the Faithwriter's Challenge staff.   This was so encouraging!  Later that summer, I was able to attend the Faithwriter's Conference in Livonia, Michigan. I had a wonderful time, learning so much and especially meeting fellow Christian writers like myself; many already tasting success in the writing world.     In common, we all love the Lord and wish to share His great love, by allowing God to use us to inspire with what words we may share. 



Faithwriter Conference 2009

  



Some of my Faithwriter buddies



Through the "Yellow feedback bars," some  thought my entry could make a great children's story, and could see this book illustrated.:

 
"This could be turned into a cute children's story/picture book."



Glynis Becker 06/13/09

God gave me a little talent in that area as well. I found myself in art class doing projects right along with my students and feeling the joy it brought me to create and use different mediums in my expression. The artist in me had been on hiatus for way too long. Through the added inspiration of Ms.Hunt at Don Lugo High School, I rediscovered my talent. Thank you also to my friend Cathy, and artist herself who joined with me in this re-booting of a gift.  

 It was very soon, that I attended a one day woman's seminar with my friend Cyndi at a church neither of us attended.  She just thought it sounded fun and would be a chance for us to fellowship and spend a day together...and  what a glorious day we had!  This group of women , a little more charasmatic than I am used to, really spoke to Cyndi and I.  We truly felt the Spirit of God moving; an exciting hope of what was to come.  I believe our friendship that day took another turn as well, becoming even more intimate as we humbled ourselves before the Lord and petitioned for His  understanding, forgiveness and His restorative purpose for our lives. 



Cyndi and Coleene



 Receiving a special gift,  a large book filled with blank pages, graced each attendee. Creatively telling God our dreams, aspirations, and prayers, with scizzors, glue and magazines, we were instructed to "cut out and tell a story."  Like a ransom note, I snipped out words that spoke of a plan, and a purpose I hoped God would honor through me.  I told Him how I wanted to feel again, how I wanted that restoration that was already taking place, to continue.  It is in the inside front page of this same book that I would begin to illustrate Thomas and Peter and their own journey and discovery adventure. 

Psalms 37:3-4 (NIV)
3 Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. 4 Take delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. 


That summer, sketching out a couple of "googly-eyed" worms, deciding I would use my artist colored pencils and praying for a vision for each page, I began.  Many warm  nights, I sat in the living room with the sketchbook in my lap, invisioning and bringing these characters to life.  My own backyard would come alive in the pages of the book and detail was paramount.  I became passionate about every page, anticipating what picture best illustrated the dialog. Packing up the book and my pencils,  they traveled with me to the conference, where I shared part of the beginnings of my dream with my new friends.  It would take me another year to complete. 

New Year 2010, after the Facebook explosion, and reconnecting with many friends, I enjoyed a mini-reunion with some of my high school buddies at a resturant in our home town.  Close to completion, I  the  took a chance to share my storybook.  Thank you Karolyn for taking this picture.

                                            

 

"A Worm's Eye View" is completed.  I have written a query introduction and I am seeking opportunities to  publish now.   What is God doing?  He is bringing the opportunities right to my doorstep.  An award winning author of over 70 books lives right here in my town, Nancy I. Sanders.  http://www.nancyisanders.com/. She leads a writing group I had inquired about, but it met during my working hours.  I never met Nancy, but it seemed we had mutual friends.  I e-mailed her and attempted to make a connection, but she was booked for six months and by that time, I was full swing into my own writing group and our self-published projects, thus 2010 almost went by without meeting with her.  A few days before Christmas while in Staples, I waited while I was having some things lamenated and a woman and  her husband walk in.  Striking up a conversation because she looked familiar to me, we continued to chat, but I could not  place her face.  Back and forth we went until she got a hint, and then introduced herself as Nancy Sanders.  Why did I recognize her but not quite place her in my life?  Pictured on a news clipping, posted on the back of my desk behind my computer all year,  Nancy Sanders!  In my busyness,  God literally brought her to me.  Long story-- short, as the cliche goes, we met after the holidays, she saw my book, she liked it, gave me encouragement, some possible ways to get it published and doors continue to open.  Moving this project along, God grants me the desire of my heart.   

    

Encouraging friends and family supporting me all through this, I thank you so very much. On Thanksgiving day, I completed the back cover.  The first week of January, I wrote my query proposal.  Editing,  re-copying and digitally copying the story, I am about ready for submission. Waiting on God, I continue to move on to many other projects, including two other stories I want to illustrate and several submissions to "Chicken Soup," and a novella loosely based on my own mother in which I am already over 10,000 words.     I am serious about this "writing thing" and so thankful to God that this seems to be working for me.  Perserverence and patience to know that God's timing is perfect timing in now my prayer,  To God Be The Glory. 

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV).

 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

 

A Story of Inspiration within an Aspiring Writer's Group.

Have you ever "signed on" to a commitment with just the notion...you'd give it a try and see what happens?  Starting in Spring of 2009, the writing group I co-lead with my partner and friend Linda B. was just that; Linda  had an inspiration, a challenge within her soul,  and she asked me to partner with her to form a writing group at our mutual home church, Chino Valley Community.  This is our story, a story of  RESTORATION, PURPOSE, STEADFASTNESS, STRENGTH, UNITY, VICTORY, MIRACLES and DESTINY brought forth in a tangible publication, "Christmas Inspirations."  

First, let me tell you a little about my friend, Linda.  A transplanted midwesterner, Linda attended San Diego State Univ, graduating summa cum laude with her degree in journalism in 1993.  It is there she met Gary, her husband.   Linda would go on to work as an Intern/Researcher for San Diego Home Garden and Lifestyles magazine where she continued to hone her skills as both a writer and editor.  After graduation she was promoted to Copy Editor/Proofreader.  She also had the opportunity to write the film column, special events, and restaurant reviews.

It was in 1979 when things took a turn for her.  Diagnosed with a intestinal condition called "Chronic Idiopathic Intestinal Pseudo-obstruction,  "I spent the next seven  years on total Parentral Nutrition and an additional three years on hydration therapy," writes Linda in our on-line quickie interview.  In layman's terms, she could not eat as others and her physical health  was very compromised. After gaining some stability, Linda suffered two major setbacks in which she came close to losing her life, once in 1995/96 and again after moving to Chino in 2000, a major setback in  2007/08.  Even though I had never met Linda; I was praying for her .  We shared a mutual friend, Cathy.   It is in this last block of time that I would hear her name through this  friend, a special person in both our lives,  who was ministering to both of us. I met Linda when she started coming to my small group.  By then, I was beginning to explore my own writing possibilities, expressing my grief (after loosing our son in Feb. of 2007)  and comfort from God in journaling and writing devotionals and stories for Faithwriters.com.  I was only sharing with a few "safe" friends.  Linda had buried her idea of becoming a writer again, discouraged for many years with her illness,  God continued to bring miracles of survival to her life and she knew God was telling her, through many encouragements from our friend Cathy, that she had more of "her story" to tell, that God had a plan for her.  (Do you see God at work here?)  

Not long after our son passed away, we moved.  I quickly learned that my new friend Linda, her husband Gary and beloved dog, Kindu,  were neighbors.  One day, Linda approached me with a  crazy idea.  "Would you like to start a writing group with me at the church?"  

"A writing group?  Who would join?...most people like Bible Study on Wed. nights...

Yep, those were my thoughts...not really negative, not wholly positive...just well, OK...we will give this a try.  If anything, we will have put forth the effort to try something different.  So, Linda and I, with the blessing of our ministry director, Jan, added "Aspiring Writer's Forum" to the calendar of Chino Valley Comm. Church. on Wed. evenings.  August  2009, the table went up for Fall class sign-ups.  We were to meet in our church library, and Linda and I started to plan class outlines and writing exercises and purchase journals. To our amazement (and why are we so amazed at what God does...after all, He is God!), we had several sign-ups.  We would start each class after prayer with a thought provoking "journal question."  Usually this question had something to do with the previous Sunday's sermon.  Everyone journaled, and then we shared...well not every one at first...but as more became vulnerable and began to share...the unity and trust began. This is how the walls came down...the ground work began...the dirt sifted and the Trust framed up in a new restorative process through the lives of those special people who took the risk and signed on.  Each will tell you of their own reluctance to be in a class as this.  Each will tell you of the weeks each kept walking back in, amazed at what God was doing amongst us, each will tell you of the Joy this class has brought to their lives. Chino Valley Community Church's Aspiring Writer's Forum had a greater purpose than we could have ever imagined in those first few weeks.   

We wrote and self published a book in nine months!  The DNA of nine aspiring writers created a booklet of Advent Stories, one for each day of December, culminating in THE Christmas Story as told in Luke 2.  Christmas Inspirations began as a "Kingdom Assignment" : a challenge from our pulpit, to take something little,  whether it be money,  talent or just sheer will and GROW it for God's Glory and to serve others. (http://kingdomassignment.org/KAfaqs.php).  After all classes took a break for the summer, we continued on, learning all we could about telling powerful stories, editing, --humbleness, graphics, art --and personal taste, about copyrights and public domain,  disappointments and new opportunities, about pagination, collating and book binding.  Through all this we prayed, and we kept evil far away.  

On Saturday, Oct. 16th, we came together for our final effort to bind this work of Love together--500 books.  Bringing the two binding machines to Irene's' house was someone else very important in this effort,  Mark, Cathy's husband. He  is a supervisor at a large industrial printing company.  While their company could not print our books for us, we decided the best way was to print on our copier at church in off hours, (with their blessing,  but not free).  Mark also helped us with a discount on paper.  Towards the end of summer, Mark had a very serious accident at work, nearly losing his hand. Without going into detail here, Mark never wavered on his effort to help us see our project to the end, despite his traumatic hand injury.  

"Christmas Inspirations" is now available for purchase.  The proceeds are designated for scholarships to  benefit children in our area to attend summer camp; this "Kingdom Assignment" now reaping the profit.  In these difficult economical times, we can see the multiplication of a "few loaves of bread  and some fish" and God's provision.  We are thankful and blessed.  Enjoy now the pictures of this effort and please, don't hesitate to purchase your own copy.  

P.S.  This September's sign-ups saw all original writers return plus we have added some new "rookies" to the mix. We  moved to a bigger classroom, the excitement looms  and although we are not ready to take on another project right now, we continue to encourage each other in our writing goals and inspire each other to their "writing destiny." 

working this summer at my house

Carl, the serious one, Rose, the college English prof and Irene, a world-wide missionary

Linda, our fearless leader, Gary, her sidekick husband, myself, and Kaela, are Hawaiian princess

Kaela and Barb, putting the back and front covers together.  

Carl,  our mid-term edition to our group, always inspiring!  

Mark, despite his mangled hand, working the hole punch machine.  

front cover and back cover, artwork by me!  

The "Double Wire O's" and the machine that "Binds"  Thank you L.G. for your effort here.  

This is L.G.  He is a new member this year and anxious to learn how to express himself in writing in English,  He is from China.  We had a lot of fun with idioms in the English language while working that afternoon.  

Linda, my partner and friend.  

Thank you Irene for your great hospitality and always positive attitude and wisdom.  

Cathy, responsible for bringing Linda and I together, Linda and Irene

Gary, carefully counting and packaging our books when complete.  

A Season of Harvest for both of us!  

Barb, our graphics expert.

Forty in each box, ready to sell  

Our group: new member L.G., Gary and Carl
Kaela, Rose, Julie, Linda, Barb, Coleene, supportive friends, Cathy and  Mark, missing member,  Sarah.  

Jesus says:  "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matt. 11:28  ( NLT)

A Rooster Leads A Chorus, A Baby In The Womb Leaps For Joy,  Tears Reflect a Blessed Life, A Camel Is Missing In Action, Mice Create Music...Read These Stories And More in "Christmas Inspirations", An Advent Compilation Of Chino Valley Community Church's Aspiring Writer's Forum

CV